Sunday, April 25, 2010

Confession Time

Today's lovely weigh in 209.4.  Happy about that I am.  But, I do have a confession to make.  I am so possessed by the loss of weight that I began doing some of my former high school days type of obsession by taking laxatives.  I have been doing this for approximately 2 months.  Why?  Because I am possessed by the need for a quick loss.  I began to doubt my ability to truly do this with my diet and forged ahead with what I know keeps the loss going and I mean literally.  I finally had to fess up and have stopped doing this as of last night.  I know it is not good for me to do this every day and I can see that I just trade one addiction for another.  Geez.  I don't like it about myself and it just makes me sad.  I have been lying to me.  I will stop this and go back to what has been working.  Diet and walking.  I will leave the obsession behind for now and go back to healthy attitudes.  No more laxatives, just eating the way I should.  I know what to do.  Sorry everyone for not being honest.  I have a long way to go both emotionally and weight.  Someday, I will get there for both of those areas.  I guess the only thing to do is confess and then release and let go.

4 comments:

  1. I have digestive trouble and often end up ermmm constipated. I think its all the cheese I eat! I usually take laxatives about twice a month, just to get things moving. Fiber actually makes it worse, and I cant go at all then! Also, I like how it helps with my weight loss, but thats only a bonus.

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  2. I have IBS and I am lucky if I go 1 a week. I wish I could find a laxative that would work for me. Fiber and lower bowel pills and even colon cleansing hasn't been too successful. My doctor said there isn't thing blocking it its just my body type...UGH!

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  3. I know where you're at with the frustration. Being overweight for the last 20+ years, I have been around the block several times with programs and gimmicks. You're doing right right by stopping the laxitives and, believe me, I thought about it myself at one time. Good for you for taking charge and doing it right. Nothing better than a healthy you!

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  4. Coming forward takes guts and I am proud of you for that...and also for realizing that laxatives arent the way to go. I have IBS and the scale can sometimes be frustrating. But I read somewhere that if you take laxatives for a while it can make your colon lazy and you become dependent on them because your colon wont contract on its own. That was enough to scare me to not use them! that would only make my situation worse!!! I know on Medifast we are limited to the amount of veggies and such, but hang in there and it will all work out.

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